Thursday, October 11, 2012

Day 11: Supportive Family/Friends

Today’s challenge was a picture of your supportive family and friends.  My husband and I are truly blessed with the outpouring of support we had after Avery left us.  Her service had over 500 people there to remember our daughter and to show their love and support for us.  I am forever grateful to all of these people who have been there for us.  For weeks, cards flooded our mailbox.  Our family has been buy our side as well as our friends.  However, when it comes down to MY biggest support, I have to say, if it was not for my husband, I don’t know if I would be even remotely close to the place I am currently at.
Even before Avery was born, during labor, he was my rock.  When the pain was intense and I just wanted to give up, he was there holding my hand, looking me in the eyes, encouraging me.  When it was decided I needed a c-section, he was there holding my hand as I was getting more nervous and anxious.  He held my hand during the surgery and when Avery came out, he was there by her side when I couldn’t be.  Instantly, he was the protective father and husband.  He was with Avery, while they stitched me up, keeping her company and safe. 

When we finally got to come home 2 days later, he was there for me.  When I couldn’t get out of bed easily or out of the chair, he was there to help me.  He would help make sure I was comfortable, change diapers, and help me prep to nurse.  He was there.  We were able to spend all 6 days of her short life together, the three of us.  We fell in love more over those 6 days than I ever thought possible. 
And when the unimaginable happened, we held each other, cried together and fell apart together.  When the time came to plan her funeral, he took charge when I couldn’t think.  He talked to people for me when I couldn’t.  When the services were over and the family went away, he was still there.  There each day with me for 2 weeks after we lost her.  And when he ran out of vacation time and so did I from work, he sucked up his emotions and went back to work so we would be OK financially.  Yet, was there when I would call him crying, came home from work when I couldn’t handle being alone.  And he is still there. On mornings when I feel like I cannot go to work, he tells me to do what I need to do.  He doesn’t force me to “get over it.” He doesn’t make me feel crazy or guilty for being so distraught.  Instead, at night, almost every night, when I cry myself to sleep, he holds me.  He is the only one who knows the horror we faced that morning and every day since.  He is the only one who can truly get how it feels to be in our empty house.  He is the only one who gets how our lives will never again be how we imagined they would be.  He is the only one who gets what it’s like to miss our beautiful daughter the way I do.

In a time when many couples grow apart and place blame, my husband is my rock, he helps me get through yet another day of facing this horrible reality.  I am so blessed and thankful that I have him with me through this.   She had him wrapped around her finger in just 6 days and he is the most wonderful father and husband I can think of.  Avery was truly her daddy’s girl.  I love this picture of the two of them.  It was taken early in the morning on June 7th when Avery was a day old.  You can see the love in his eyes through the tiredness. 

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